This is the second in a five-part series of Shakespeare Lipograms. For my second lipogram, I have chosen to summarize a Comedy, As You Like It, using “E” as the only vowel.

Enjoy!

The elder gentle begets three men, then meets the end. He cedes the eldest, the Stern Keeper, the effects. The next, the Descent Between, he sends hence. The wee seed, the Extreme Teen, dwells the lesser. The Extreme Teen resents the settlement’s terms. He self-tests the mettle when he enters the Esteemed Wrestler’s meet.

Pretender Fred, the regent, sees the wrestlers meet. (Pretender Fred sent hence the pre-empted regent, Excellent Elder, when he wrested the scepter.) The Esteemed Wrestler wrestles well, yet the Extreme Teen sweeps the meet. The Effervescent Belle sees the Extreme Teen edge the Esteemed Wrestler. She expresses her preference. He gets her present: her jewels. He’s speechless.

Pretender Fred sends the Effervescent Belle hence. She seeks her begetter, the Excellent Elder, between the trees. The Sweet Eggshell tempts the Clever Jester. The three enter between the trees. They dress the sheep herder ensemble. The Effervescent Belle effects the Pretend Gent pretense. The Sweet Eggshell effects the Pretend Shepherdess pretense.

The Feeble Server tells the Extreme Teen severe news. The Stern Keeper’s scheme expects Extreme Teen’s end. They flee between the trees, where the Excellent Elder’s gentlemen dwell (e.g., the Depressed Gentle, etc.). They trek, they even jet, except when Feeble Server needs rest. When he sleeps, Extreme Teen seeks refreshment.

The Effervescent Belle wends between the trees. She precedes the Sweet Eggshell. The Sweet Eggshell precedes the Clever Jester. They see the Senseless Shepherd tell the Elder Shepherd he reveres the Relentless Shepherdess. The Elder Shepherd sells the three the effects, the sheep, even the shelter where they’ll dwell.

The Excellent Elder serves refreshments when he meets the blessed gentlemen. Even the Depressed Gentle enters well-cheered: he met the Clever Jester. Yet, when the Extreme Teen enters, he expects he’ll fence. When the Excellent Elder’s clement, the Extreme Teen repents: he’ll be meek. The Extreme Teen seeks the Feeble Server. Then, the Depressed Gentle renders the best speech yet:

“The scene-set emblem expresses well the sphere’s extent. Men enter. They egress. They represent seven degrees. When they enter, they represent the new-bred fledge. Then, the cheerless prep. Then, the tender teen. Next, the reckless selectee. Then, the well-versed expert. Then, the effete elder. When the event ends, they’re the mere speck: less teeth, less eyes, less keenness, less self.”

The Extreme Teen pens metered verses. They revere the Effervescent Belle’s esteem. She sees the trees where he embeds them. He meets her between the trees, except she yet effects her Pretend Gent pretense. The Extreme Teen tells the Pretend Gent he reveres the Effervescent Belle. He’s dense, yet she relents. The Pretend Gent tells the Extreme Teen he’ll pretend he’s the Effervescent Belle. Remember the Pretend Gent pretense: he’s the Effervescent Belle! Hence, the Effervescent Belle pretends she’s the Pretend Gent, then he (the Pretend Gent) pretends he’s the Effervescent Belle. Get the scheme?

The Relentless Shepherdess rejects the Senseless Shepherd. The Pretend Gent tells the Relentless Shepherdess she needs the Senseless Shepherd. The Relentless Shepherdess prefers the Pretend Gent. Gee. The Depressed Gentle cheers the gentlemen’s deer. The Relentless Shepherdess sends the Pretend Gent her letter. The Senseless Shepherd schleps the letter. The Pretend Gent tells the Senseless Shepherd he needs less Relentless Shepherdess. The Stern Keeper enters. He tells them the Extreme Teen bled. The red sheet lessens the Effervescent Belle’s tender senses. The Sweet Eggshell prefers the Stern Keeper. The Stern Keeper tells her Yes!

The Tree-dweller Plebe reveres the Wretched Wench. The Clever Jester jeers. The Wretched Wench prefers the Clever Jester. The Tree-dweller Plebe flees, dejected. The Extreme Teen, the Pretend Gent, the Senseless Shepherd, even the Relentless Shepherdess, meet. The Senseless Shepherd tells them he reveres the Relentless Shepherdess. The Relentless Shepherdess tells them she reveres the Pretend Gent. The Extreme Teen tells them he reveres the Effervescent Belle. The Pretend Gent tells them he’ll get them wed.

The gentlemen meet. The Stern Keeper expects he’ll wed the Pretend Shepherdess (the Sweet Eggshell, remember?). The Clever Jester enters. He expects he’ll wed the Wretched Wench. The Clever Jester tells the Depressed Gentle the seven effects. The Effervescent Belle enters, less the Pretend Gent pretense. Next, the Sweet Eggshell enters, less the Pretend Shepherdess pretense. They cheer.

The Extreme Teen weds the Effervescent Belle. The Stern Keeper weds the Sweet Eggshell. The Clever Jester weds the Wretched Wench. The Senseless Shepherd weds – yes – the Relentless Shepherdess! The Descent Between (remember?) enters. He tells them Pretender Fred repented! The Excellent Elder expects he’ll be regent. They cheer, except the Depressed Gentle. He recedes. The rest revel.

This entry was posted on Sunday, November 23rd, 2008 at 7:25 pm and is filed under As You Like It, Lipogram, Shakespeare. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.